The Carnivorous Muffin's Guide to Finding the Meaning of Life

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

Wilkomen!

It’s time I made a master post.

If you’re looking for where my actual writing lives: Ao3 and of course the ill fated Wolves’ Planet web comic (story by me, art by @rhombusgirl)

I have a meta blog, @thecarnivorousmuffinmeta where I post my controversial thoughts on very niche parts of Harry Potter and other fandoms. If you want to ask me for my take on characters, stories, etc. please do so there.

I have an art blog, @thecarnivorousmuffinart where all the fan art for my stories, art associated with my work, as well as my own art lives.

Pinned Post welcome writing art meta
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rankheresy

July 2023 writing competition

Write a Summer-themed oneshot!

A Summer theme can mean anything at all. Your fic takes place in the Summer; the characters are on a distant planet where there's only one season (Summer) and they're not sure how to feel about it; your fic is a Midsommar crossover; your character eats ice cream; anything goes, so long as nobody builds a snowman.

A oneshot is, as described by Fanlore: A standalone fanfiction story is one that is complete in and of itself, without prequels or sequels, and is not part of an ongoing series or shared universe. The author may put "1/1" in the header to indicate that there is only going to be one part of the story, and this is it. Standalone stories may be of any length, but they are usually posted all at once, and not broken up into parts and serially posted. (x)

Works are submitted here!

Happy writing!

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Introducing the 2023 Summer Co-Writing Challenge

Veterans will remember last year's great co-writing challenge where all participants cooperated on a single fic, each of us taking turns writing the next chapter of a fic.

This year we're doing a similar but not identical summer co-writing challenge:

Everyone who signs up will be divided into pairs, and take turns writing chapters. You will not discuss where the fic is going, you will not outline, you will not have any idea what your partner is going to do with their chapter. You just have to wait and find out what you're writing the next chapter to.

The rules are these:

  • No retcons, "it was all a dream", "Luckily she found out none of what had just happened actually mattered" or in other ways undoing the previous chapters
  • No sudden shift in the main cast (we take a break from the Guardians of the Galaxy fic to have a chapter about Tony Stark instead!)
  • Minimum chapter length 300 words
  • No killing important characters (at least not without buildup)
  • No editing previous chapters (removing typos is okay)
  • You agree on content warnings and rating beforehand, and stick to this.
  • And most importantly: no outline. You are not allowed to discuss where the fic is going with your partner, you just have to wing it.

If you already have a partner in mind, let us know: if not, one will be assigned. If an odd number signs up, we get a three-man team.

Sign up here!

The challenge runs through August 31st, but partners are welcome to conclude their story before then. You can sign up at any time.

For the sake of keeping everything in one place, we ask that fics will be submitted to this challenge.

Very serious awards such as "Highest number of plot twists", "Most cohesive overall story award", "Most surprising genre shift" will be bestowed upon our gracious participants on September 1st.

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therealvinelle

Anonymous asked:

Hi! I know you 're super busy rn and I apologized if Muffin and you have answered this question already but, what kind of gifts do you think would actually be useful to Aro? I mean, for them to be in the Volturi? Thank you so much for your fics, I'm on a binge -read and I'm loving them all so much! You guys are so talented!!❤️ Hope you have a lovely day!!

therealvinelle answered:

Thank you for the lovely praise, anon! Look, @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin, praise!

As for your question: it’s already answered!

theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin

Ooh, praise!

ask anon praise vinelle therealvinelle
therealvinelle

Anonymous asked:

so breaking off of the Esme being Actually Pretty Cool™ timeline, what if Esme had been like that in PRM and/or TltIC

also big fan of both of those btw <3

therealvinelle answered:

It’s been too long since I received this ask, I no longer have any idea what timeline anon is referring to. I do however, see the praise for @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin’s Painting Red Madonnas and our co-written spinoff to Painting Red Madonnas, The Less Than Immaculate Conception.

So thank you for the praise and look, Muffin, praise!

(I will make this note - Esme is Esme, her characterization is the same in every fic. If she’s cooler in one then circumstances put her there. So the answer is that nothing changes because Esme’s circumstances would have to change in order for her to act differently.)

theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin

Ooh, praise!

twilight twilight renaissance painting red madonnas the less than immaculate conception praise vinelle therealvinelle

Anonymous asked:

Hi there! Feel free to ignore this but I was wondering if you had any tips for beginner writers? And I’m talking verryyy beginner writers. I saw you recommended having someone proofread and everything but was wondering about how to make those connections? Also any more book recommendations would be great! Love your work.

Hey no worries.

Finding people can be a little tricky but not too bad. In my case, they all sort of happened organically, and most of the time I went without proofreaders (with mixed results, there are chapters here and there I regret).

One thing is to start writing and see if any of the readers you pick up are interested. Try to pick someone among them that’s actually written before and whose work you like. It’s good in that they’re invested in your story and want to see it continue.

Another is to check out various discord servers for whatever fandom/pair/whatever you’re interested in. Most of them will usually have a fanfiction section and in there will usually have places for ideas and feedback and recruiting beta readers for your fic.

Another is to just go out and cold call. Find an author who’s work you like and see if they’d be willing to take a look. Sometimes people will list on their profile/tumblr/wherever that they’re willing to beta read people’s work. Politely ask them if they’d be interested and at worst they can decline.

Honestly, the best thing though is to just start writing. It may not be great at first, but that’s what practice is for, and in time you’ll get the hang of it.

As for book recommendations… genre?

writing writing advice
therealvinelle

Anonymous asked:

Hi! Finally got to read the fanfic and wow -- I binged it in one setting. I love how insufferable Edward is, how Bella has like... Patrick star level of critical thinking there... How awful everyone is, well except from Carlisle, Carlie and Rose. Worth every minute

therealvinelle answered:

(I believe anon is referring to Bleach on the Brain and/or Leech in the Rain (the latter is co-written with @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin)

Thank you for the praise!

theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin

Ooh, praise!

twilight writing praise vinelle therealvinelle
therealvinelle

Anonymous asked:

this is probably going to be really awkwardly worded but there's this Agatha Christie book called 'Body in the Library', and it's a Miss Marple book so when she figures it out at the end Mrs bantry is all 'omg how did you do that?' and Miss Marple basically goes 'everyone approached the situation believing what they were told; I didn't believe anything I was told and that's how I saw the truth' and that whole thing really reminds me of you and the Muffin

therealvinelle answered:

Yup, that’s why I love Agatha Christie so much. You’re supposed to distrust all the characters, everyone’s either lying or mistaken and if you want to figure out who did it you have to look at who could know what at which moment, what we know about them versus what we think we know about them, what we know about the murder and whether there were any misdirections at the crime scene, and so on.

Christie is truly an inspiration. Here’s an incomplete rec list!

And hooray, I’m thrilled to hear you enjoy “The Body in the Library”! It’s one of the classics.

Look, @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin, a compliment to us and praise for Ms. Christie!

theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin

Oooh, praise!

ask anon praise vinelle therealvinelle
therealvinelle

griffynbird101 asked:

Hiya! Been following you for a while, just finished LITR. Binged BONB and LITR in like a couple of days. I have to say this is one of my favourite fics because, a) it is so bizarre that is laughable and b) somehow it is totally believable for our wonderful (terrible terrible) Cullen clan. You are a great writer, kudos to you friend.


First of all, the fate of Renée and Bella is so dark. Like I kept waiting for the ball to drop because I know better than to expect “everyone lived happily ever after” in your fics. But it just kept getting worse, and then we didn’t even get to see the end for Bella and that just made it worse. Like god, I hate Renée so much in the series but still for her to have to make the decision to MERCY KILL her daughter, like wow.


And Edward… I just… do I even need to say anything? Edward is Edward x10


(*The Romanians, fallen gods who have waited 1000s of years for revenge*

Edward, completely serious, channeling all his century worth of wisdom, going off on his noble quest: We are going to bring an end to tyranny through the power of friendship)


Jacob is whole level of disturbing I never considered before, I just can’t even.

Poor Renesmee/Carlie. Like so many reasons for this girl to hate the world.

(Also Jessica Stanley was an absolute gem. The amount of excitement I felt when I realized that she would also be kidnapped by the Volturi was unreal.)


But hey, considering you started Bleach on the Brain thinking it was only gonna be 2 chapters, and it turned into 2 parts with 40 chapters, I’d say it went pretty good eh?)

therealvinelle answered:

Thank you so much for leaving such a wonderful message! I really appreciate it, I’m glad you enjoyed the fic(s).

Look, @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin, sweet praise!

theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin

Ooh, praise!

leech in the rain bleach on the brain praise griffynbird101 vinelle therealvinelle